Me and My New Boyfriend, Azhar

Met hym at KPO Bar during Chivas Event. He was drinking with a few friends while im doing my work. A friend of mine, Katy, pointed to me at hym. She said, hey, that guy is not bad. Then i looked, and i fell. Ooooohh!!! he's my type!!!! HAHA!!! Katy wrote my number in a soviets and passed to hym. Haha!! I was in the toilet and dont know what's happening, the moment i went out of the toilet, i didnt see hym at all.. I thot he went hme but hys frens were still there... I didnt see hym for the rest of the night.

Until the next day in the morning, i was at work and he called me, I was so FUCKIN' HAPPY at that moment. We met a few days later and he asked to be hys girlfrend. I said yes although i know its too early but if i dont accept, im afraid i will lose this chance cuz he is the guy that i really want. A guy with career, looks and good at heart, and most important thing is, a bright future. Hopefully he is the right one for me. Pray hard for Mel and Azhar.

My Break Up

Everything change after a yr and 7. Our relationship is growing weak. I just dont feel anymore love. I just find him too showed off when he knows he got nothing to be proud of. He is too dependent on me. I dont see a bright future in him, so i decided to move on with my life. He cant accept the fact that we have already break up. He said he still love me but no matter what, i wont return to him... never . Good bye Muhd Rauf.

tiada guna ku

Batu bara ku rintangi jln tanaman duri
Masih mampu ku gagahi walau darah ku mengalir
Mana bisa ku lupa kan tk mampu ku dagang kan
Semua detik kenangan ku ukir jadi pedoman
Yg dulu ku gelarkan istana idaman impian

Tiada guna ku tangis mengharap kan yg indah
Sedang kan aku tahu dosa balasnya dosa
Tiada guna ku sedih saat ditinggal pergi
Kini aku sedari ini balasan illahi untuk ku

Tiada guna ku merayu mengharap kan kasih mu
Sedang kan aku tahu payah buat mu
Tiada guna ku disini disini dan masih menanti
Kini aku sedari takdir illahi

TKS to the ENEMY !

November 2007 . Its about a girl name ILAkecik . Someone was making a story that im flirting with a guy name Nazmi in my class, which is a rumours ! Until the story went all the way to the gf which is ILAkecik . I dont even know who was the one who told her . But I know for myself that i am not in the wrong . One fine day, a guy contacted me. Trying hys very best to flirt with me . But im totally not interested ! Hys name is Ahmad . The next day, another guy contacted me . Hys name is Rauf . He msged me . I wasn't in a mood to reply . The next day, something makes me wanted to contact that guy and i called hym . I called hym n asked who is he . He said he sent the msg to a wrong no. so sorry . Then someone at my back shouted 'takmo step salah no. la n 'F' hym' . I continue msging hym and i actually fall for the way he talk to me . One day, we met . It was outside my school, after i had my exam . I saw hym and was blushing all the way . He bring me to meet hys friends and i were introduced by hym . To my surprise, when he introduced me to this one guy . Which is Ahmad . Alright, there must be something's going on here . But i just kept quiet . The next day, he finally told me everything ! He said, first Ahmad's plan was, he wanted to busted me, and THAT was from ILA's FUCKING idea ! My mind was freezed ! Im so shocked ! So, Ila is Ahmad's fren . Then he told me that I dont entertain Ahmad when Ahmad tried to getto know me . Maybe God is telling me, dont fall into hys trap . Then Ahmad felt that im not interesting and he passed my no to Rauf . Then my feeling was 50/50 because i cant easily trust a person from my enemy . Then slowly i get to know Rauf closer . I felt love and trust . From there, we built our relationship up till now . Its been a yr and 3 mths old with love . Tks to the enemy !

CINTAKU DIPERMAINKAN

June 2006.
I know this one guy thru MSN. His name is Naszri Khan aka IKAN. I saw his picture and it was like love at the first sight! We exchanged number. We contact and became close like siblings but never met. He was attached but im not. So i surrendered because i know that there is no hope between us, not more than siblings. Then we stopped contacting for a few months.

January 2007.
I have a friend, her name is Has. She is my schoolmate in ITE and also my neighbour.
She recommend me to her cousin named Muhammad Hafiz Hidayat. We contacted and i was so into to him but we've NEVER MET!
there was a few times i wanted to meet him. I waited for 3 hours and he was not there. The one that came is Has and the same thing happened everytime i want to meet him.
And then, i got to know that he has been contacting with many girls. Two of the girls is my friend! Imagine how pain my heart is!
I talk to the girls and they were very shocked when they too get to know that Hidayat has so many girls around him.
I talk to Has about this and she said that Hidayat has no other girls besides me and he is very faithful to me. I trusted her but many thoughts came to my mind.
Slowly and shockingly i found out that all this while, there is no such person as Muhammad Hafiz Hidayat. The one that i have been messaging is Has. She pretended to be him. IT REALLY HURTS until now, i dont talk to Has anymore. Luckily our relationship lasts for only 2 months.

March 2007.
I contacted Nas(ikan) again and tell him the whole story. At that point of time, he already broke up with his gf and i was like so happy and i make use of this opportunity.
We met on 22nd March. He waited for me outside my school and we go and watch movies and chilled at Haagen Dasz. It was like my 1st TRUE LOVE! I cant believe that im dating with him.
Its like a dream came true! He sent me home. We slow dance at the void deck without music and it was like sooooo ROMANTIC! sooooooo MAGIC! I felt soooooooo IN LOVE with him!He called me at night and we talk till morning. I didnt sleep well after that. I just cant get him out of my head! i was like ILOVEHIM ILOVEHIM ILOVEHIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But day by day his love for me has changed. It was like fading away.. While mine is still strong.
He is busy with his friends. His "GANG"! RIOTING, DRUNK, CLUBBING, some drugs and what hurts me the most is GIRLS! we only lasts one month and 2 days.. I cant bring our relationship further, i cant afford. My heart is so pain! No one can heal!
There was once a girl answer my call at his num. Her name is Yasmin. She declare that they have been together for 3 years. I hang up the phone, dont want to hear the rest. I called again and this time, he anwered my call. He admit that he and Yasmin has been together for 3 years. I did not believe. But still, i cant take it anymore, i asked for break up. He said ok as i wish. I was so shocked that he said like that! Is this love? I dont think so! I just walked out of his life with many pieces of a broken heart. I cried non stop until i met with so many different guys every day. Just to feel loved. But no one can replace him.NO ONE NAS! i hope u read this!! ........even though u read this, i dont think that u will care about what i wrote here.
My 1st love only lasts for 1month. IT HURTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!